(directed by Lee Tamahori)
007 (Pierce Brosnan) had fallen into the clutches of enemies of the
state before, yet being equipped with the quartermaster’s special tools
and his own legendary quick wits provided for miraculous escapes. This
time would be different however. M orders were for 007 to infiltrate
North Korean Colonel Moon’s (Will Yun Lee) personal base situated along
the DMZ zone have put an end to his diamonds for weapons business.
Circumstances led Bond to engage Colonel Moon in a terrific hovercraft
chase, which itself ended with Bond being captured by the North Korean
military and the colonel supposedly dead. Our agent remained
incarcerated for 14 months...until, to M’s great reluctance, Britain
decided to make a trade with the North Koreans: James Bond 007 for Zao
(Rick Yune), colonel’s Moon right hand man who had fallen into our
hands.
Unsatisfied with his fate, Bond opted to go against
official regulation and hunt down Zao to finish off the job he had been
tasked with over a year ago. The renegade military man was now in Cuba
for a very mysterious reason: plastic surgery. Just prior to coming face
to face with his old nemesis Bond came to notice a CIA agent who was
also hot on Zao’s trails, Jinx (Halle Berry). Even together they failed
liquidate Zao, but opportunity for them to form a partnership would
come knocking again as both were sent to Iceland to attend a grand
spectacle of technology hosted by one of Britain’s most tireless
entrepreneur, Gustav Graves (Tobey Stevens). His crack team of
scientists had created a super satellite which fed off the power of the
sun, and he was about to make a glorious demonstration of its power.
Something about Graves did not sit well with Bond however...
2002 was the 40th anniversary of the James Bond film franchise. Indeed,
Dr. No
had had been released exactly four decades prior, and to the delight of
fans of the franchise around the globe, it was decided that 2002 would
be a celebratory year. Anniversary books were published, the original
scores to every film were given re-mastering treatment, and of course a
new Bond film was to be released. The producers make some very
deliberate choices in the pre-production and production of the latest
007 adventure,
Die Another Day. The new film would have to pay
tribute to Bond’s past stories as well as become cutting edge and as up
to date as possible. The single most important thing was to make the
movie big. They made the movie big alright, and in more ways than one.
I rarely get as passionate about a Bond film as I do whenever the issue of
Die Another Day
is of the order. As much as I would love to have it otherwise, that
passion emanates from a compounding frustration whenever watching Lee
Tamahori’s version of this favourite film universe of mine. True enough,
the current marathon has proven a fertile field to explain my bitter
disappointment with entries the likes of
DAF and
AVTAK, yet in hindsight those two seem comparatively easy to thrash. They are terrible from start to finish.
DAD is far more annoying and sly in how its awfulness creeps up on the viewer. In a nutshell, the main criticism aimed at
DAD
is that is comprises of two films in one. The first, while far from
perfect, is genuinely good. The second is some of the worst material the
franchise has ever asked its fans and general movie goers to swallow
and digest.
The section of
DAD that earns some well
deserved points is its first half. Quite honestly, it tries some rather
bold things, especially for a Bond film. The North Korean setting is
compelling for how unapologetic it is with regards to real world
politics (much like how the original Fleming novels were as they very
bluntly pointed out that, in the world of 007, the Russians were simply
the bad guys), as well as for the cinematography exercised. That cold
blue palette exudes a great sense of atmosphere, as Bond is pretty much
alone in a land of enemies, not to mention that the location is a cold
military compound. Perhaps the lone sour spot is the hovercraft chase
between Bond and Colonel Moon. It came to no surprise when the
supplemental material on the disc revealed something I had suspected all
along: those crafts are not moving as fast as the editing wants to the
viewer to believe, which feels a bit cheep to me. That being said, what
follows is terrific: James Bond 007 is captured by the North Korean
military and imprisoned for a period of 14 months. 14 months! This is
James Bond! That adds a lot of weight to the story and to the legendary
quality of the character, who is up and running after Zao barely a day
or so after being released in an exchange program set up by his MI6
superiors (a nice touch on the part of the filmmakers to show the
torture scenes during the title sequence, thus helping us not pay
attention to Madonna’s ridiculous theme song). Brosnan is pretty good
during this stretch, despite some weak one liners (‘saved by the
bell’=lame) and the Cuban setting, even though it wasn’t actually filmed
in Cuba, is a lot of fun. 007 going on his own for personal redemption,
similar but not identical to what happens in
LTK. The first
hour or so of this film, generally, does the franchise justice. There is
some intrigue about the whole plastic surgery aspect of the plot, 007
going semi-rogue makes the proceedings interesting as well, and the
locations are superb. There is enough materiel for a fan such as myself
to want to know where the story is headed.
But as is so often the case with this series, when a story could
potentially remain small and more tightly focused on Bond as an agent
the trials and tribulations he faces, that is not the direction the
filmmakers wish to take. Nay, the film’s scale must shoot through the
roof. This is the twentieth film after all! Make it loud! Make it huge!
Oh brother, do they ever make it loud and huge...
From
the moment Bond meets up with M in the secret London underground
location, things speed in one direction and one direction only: down,
way down. It’s all so strange how the two halves of this movie are so
vastly different. This second half is so ridiculously over the top it
really becomes difficult to accept, not merely as a James Bond movie,
but even as part of the same movie. The eye-rolling moments start in the
second half, when Q, now played far too intentionally like a clown by
John Cleese, demonstrates how Bond’s new Aston Martin can reflect light
in such a way bla, bla, bla so as to become invisible. Right at this
moment, at least in my opinion, it becomes clear that the rest of the
movie is most likely going to be a big joke. Interestingly, Bond re-uses
one the most famous lines from all 007/Q verbal jests: ‘You must be
joking.’ It's just a shame it had to be used for a scene such as this
one.
Our protagonist is then sent to Iceland to investigate
Gustav Graves’ business operations regarding this brand new satellite of
his. Before going any further, a moment should be taken to enlighten
the 00-uninitiated. To fully capture the spirit of the 40th anniversary
celebrations, the producers and writers and director thought it clever
to include various nods to the character’s past within this single film.
While a cute idea on paper, some of them prove to be less than
effective, some downright ridiculous, especially when they choose the
worst things to pay homage to, namely, the overall plot to
DAF,
one of the worst entries in the entire series. Laser satellite made of
diamonds and a villain who has changed his appearance thanks to plastic
surgery, anyone? That’s right, Gustav Graves is supposed to be our
friend enemy colonel Moon, only now Caucasian and speaking in a perfect
British accent. How he covers up his past to be accepted as one of
Britain’s major entrepreneurs in a matter of a single year doesn’t seem
to concern the screenwriters much, the point is that they are doing a
call-back to
DAF. Fan service is, in absolute zero
circumstances, a necessary tool for storytelling. It can be fun, I shall
admit that much, but when it is making your story worse, that’s not a
good sign. To top that off, Tobey Stevens, in the role of Graves,
smudges his performance with nothing but sneer, which becomes very, very
grating after a while. The abrasive cockiness he displays is more
annoying than it is genuinely threatening.
So back to this
‘plot’, Bond meets up with Jinx in Iceland, the latter whom is
pretending to be a journalist. Now, Jinx is not the most impressive Bond
girl the series has created, but she was at least serviceable during
the Cuba sequence. Maybe a few too many lines that aimed for sass and
nothing else, but serviceable. Much like the rest of this movie, Jinx is
absolutely atrocious from Iceland onwards. A ‘Yo momma!’ reply when
being interrogated, seriously? A ‘Bitch!!!’ cry when defeating the MI6
traitor Miranda Frost (Rosamund Pike)? Screenwriters, now you really
must be joking. Except that they aren’t. Ugh.
In all sincerity,
the mistakes committed by...I guess just about everybody, could be
partially forgiven were the action scenes of high calibre. I mean, if a
Bond film’s script is going to be trash, at least get the action right.
You know, like paying homage to
Moonraker. Apparently that
wasn’t a good idea, but rather than pay homage by doing things for real
(with stunt people, that is) they actually decide to go state of the
art, in line with what so many other films had been doing for a few
years already at that point in 2002: CGI. I have made the case many
times before, both at Between the Seats and on the Filmspotting message
boards, that I support CGI and understand its usefulness. Bond films, on
the other hand, are not where you want to use it, at least not
abundantly (
Quantum of Solace has a bit, but uses it well). The
‘doing for real’ aspect of the series is one the producers and
virtually everyone involved had proclaimed with great pride for years
already. Why the sudden urge to go CG so intensely and in so many scenes
is confounding. The results are ridiculous, with Bond being chased by a
laser as ‘powerful as the sun’ on an ice lake, a finale involving a CG
plane being torn to shreds by the same laser, and, by leaps and bounds
the most egregious decision, Bond using a broken metal plate from a
speed vehicle and a parachute to windsurf and jump from iceberg to
iceberg as a tidal wave fast approaches from behind. If you think that
last part sounds stupid just by reading it, rent the movie and watch it.
You ain’t seen nothing yet, brother.
I forgot one thing: speed ramping. That never needs to appear again in a Bond film. Never. Period.
DAD
is a film that aggravates me to no end. The fact that is starts
strongly, only to end with its tail wagging shamefully between its legs,
is infuriating. Even the simple task of grading it poses headaches.
What to do with a film that offers an entertaining first hour but lazy
writing, poor acting and stupid action during its second? I don’t think I
ever had to actually grade this movie, so I’m honestly wondering what
to do as I type this conclusion. I forgot one thing: speed ramping.
Bad finish (F) trumps good start (B).
D
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